


One last time

by Abitfairytailforme



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: F/F, Other: See Story Notes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-27
Updated: 2016-07-02
Packaged: 2018-07-10 15:01:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 19
Words: 8,465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6990169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Abitfairytailforme/pseuds/Abitfairytailforme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alex has come in and out of Olivia's life many times. Will Olivia take her back when she comes home again?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Return again

**Author's Note:**

> This is going to be multiple chapters with varying ratings per chapter, so if you wish to know if it is going to be G, T, M, or E, look to notes. It is also possible that new relationships enter the fic, but I will add the tags as they come up.
> 
> Sorry for any grammatical errors, any facts in the show that I messed up, and if any courtroom or actual laws I mess up.
> 
> Takes place sometime in the 16th season
> 
> Hope you enjoy, rate, and follow the story line(I will be posting as frequently as I can when inspiration strikes.)
> 
> This chapter is rated G

Alex stepped out of the stuffy airport and took a deep breath. Something she said once came rushing back to her, along with the smell of garbage and exhaust fumes.

 

_ “I wish these windows opened. I want to smell the city.” _

 

That was forever ago, at her return to testify in the Valdez trial. She had said it to Olivia, the person she couldn’t wait to see today.

 

No one knew she was coming back, hell, she didn’t even know she was coming back until just a week ago. She needed a break, a long break, from the depressing stories she dealt with. So she decided to come back to the city and try to get back her job back. Or at least an ADA, if not SVU cases. 

 

She just hoped she could get something, someone, else she cared about deeply back as well.

 

~~~~~~~~

 

“Rollins, take Carisi and go check out the scene. Fin, you come with me to interview her at the hospital.” Shouldn’t Cragen be making those calls? She wondered. Or at least Munch. Also, who the hell was Carisi? She’d been away way too long she realized. 

 

“You know what, I’ll be with you in a minute, I need to grab something from my desk.” She heard Olivia say. With the other detectives gone, she took her chance, slipping into the precinct and standing in the doorway, watching the detective she loved and hadn’t seen in years.

 

She waited, quietly, and kept her cool, even when the detective first saw her.

 

“Alex.” she says. The same thing she’s said every time she returned, when she returned from the dead(almost literally), when she returned for the Valdez trial, when she just returned from witness protection, even when she returned from Africa the first time. It was always the same word. Her name.

 

But every time before, Alex could hear surprise, and a little bit of happiness and excitement in the detective’s voice.

 

Today, Alex heard nothing.

 

She just heard her name.


	2. The questions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter rates a G

They say nothing for a minute. Olivia, not knowing what to say, Alex having been in and out of her life so many times. 

 

“So…” Alex starts, but trails off.

 

“Where’ve you been, Alex? You just disappeared one day. I didn’t know where you were, again.”

 

“I went back to Africa, Liv.”

 

“Why’d you come back?”

 

“Because I realized that I’m more useful here and more of the things I want are here.”

 

“Like what.” It’s not a question, it’s a demand of knowledge. Just like Olivia.

 

“My job, my friends, and… you.”

 

“And what makes you think that you can get your jobs and your friends back? What makes you think that you deserve me after all of this time?”

 

“I…” Alex, the woman who owns words, has got nothing.

 

“Alex, you could have at least told us, told me, where you were. You could have written. Instead, you just dropped out of my life, and it’s not like when you were in WPP, you could have.”

 

“I know.”

 

“You know that Elliots gone, George is gone, Munch is gone, Cragen is gone. They’re all gone, and you didn’t know.”

 

“Where’d they go?”

 

“Last I heard, which was years ago, Elliots in California, George is working for the Feds directly, Munch and Cragen are retired.”

 

“Who’s in the squad now?”

 

“Me, Rollins, Fin, Amaro, and a new guy, Carisi.”

 

“That’s it?”

 

“Yeah, that’s it.”

 

“Who’s the ADA?”

 

“Rafael Barba.”

 

“Who’s running the squad?”

 

“I am. Speaking of which, I’m late. Fins probably already running up the stairs wondering where the hell I am. Bye, Alex. Maybe I’ll see you again one day.” Olivia starts to walk out, fed up with the women that has caused her so much pain over the years.

 

“Wait. I want to talk. To make it right. Please, at least give me that chance.”

 

“Why should I?”

 

“Because… I don’t know, Liv. Because I love you and never stopped and at least let me talk to you. I’m not going away again. I’ll take you out for a nice dinner where we can talk. Just talk. Please?”

 

Olivia looked at the magical Alexandra Cabot. The strong woman who got what she want by doing it herself. And here she was, begging for another chance.

 

“Fine. But you’re coming to my place.” She paused, grabbed a pencil and paper, and scribbled down the address. “I don’t have a lot of time to go out, so we’ll order in.” 

 

“You moved.”

 

“Yeah. Maybe I’ll tell you why one day. Be there at 8:00.”

 

Alex looked at the paper.

 

She really didn’t deserve this chance. 


	3. Realization

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter is rated a G

Alex looked at the piece of paper again, to make sure that she was at the right place, before she knocked. 

“Shit!” she could hear Olivia say, and she smiled. The detecti… sorry, Lieutenant, hadn’t changed that much while she was gone.

Olivia opened the door for her and she could see that the detective’s hand had been on her weapon, still on her hip. Her other hand, well, it was holding a boy. A child really. Okay, maybe she had changed a bit, she realized.

“Come in, Alex” Olivia says, bouncing the unsettled boy on her hip.

“Thanks.” Alex says, and she steps into the apartment. “Who’s this little guy?” Alex asks, smiling at the boy. The boy smiles back, for a second, before hiding his face in Olivia’s side.

“This little boy is obviously very shy. And his name’s Noah.” Alex looked at the smile on Olivia’s face. Motherhood suited her.

“Congrats, Liv. When’d you get a kid?”

“It’s complicated. He’s kinda mine. I’m his foster mother.”

“How did you become a foster mother?”

“Long story.”

“And I’m not going anywhere, Liv. I want to hear it. To get caught up with you.”

“Well, then buckle in. It’s been a wild few years.” Liv smiles. Alex wasn’t going anywhere, so what could it hurt to share it with her?

Alex smiles too. It definitely had to be a wild few years if Liv was a lieutenant and had a child.

That’s okay though. She wanted to hear it all.


	4. Stories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rated G

“Wow. So you don’t know who the father is?” 

“No. I don’t want to. I’m starting the adoption papers.” Olivia says, smiling down at the boy in his crib. “Night, Noah.” She says and they leave the room. Olivia’s been pretty open so far in the evening and the blonde’s been taking that as a good sign. Alex just decided to take it one step at a time, friends first. She wanted the brunette back, but she knew that wasn’t going to happen quickly, so she would settle for friends.

“Liv, if you need a lawyer…” she offers.

“I’ll come to you. You may have left, but you are the best.” Alex’s heart swells at the compliment.

Alex is really curious as to why the brunette moved, she had loved her apartment and made it her home, she wouldn’t move without a good reason, but she could see that whatever it was, Olivia wasn’t ready to talk about it with her, so she wasn’t going to ask again.

“Who’s this new lawyer, Rafael Barba?”

“You never heard of him?”

“I may have heard his name a few times, but I want to hear it from you.”

“I lucked out with him. He’s good, wins a lot of his cases. Best wardrobe ever.”

“Better than mine?”

“Almost.”

“Good wardrobe is important and all, but what’s his attitude?”

“The right mixture of cocky and sassy. I can’t tell if you would hate or love him.”

“I’m leaning towards hating him, but I’d have to meet him first.”

“You can if you want. You probably will if you’re looking for a job in the DA’s office. Have you gone to them yet?”

“I did today. I probably won’t get SVU, in any division, so I asked for something in Manhattan. They said that Homicide is open.”

“So…”

“They said no promises, but they seemed happy to see me. I think I’ll get it.”

“Well, let’s drink to that!” Olivia says. “I have a really nice bottle of wine if you want?”

“I would love to have some, thank you.”

Olivia nods and gets up. Alex follows her.

They drink and share stories. Then drink a little more.

“You said you got a new guy, Carisi, how is he?”

“He’s pretty good. I swear, I thought he was an asshole the first time I met him.”

“Really, Liv.”

“Yup. And he kinda was.”

“So, what happened?”

“Well, I don’t know.” Olivia thinks for a moment. “Okay, so this guy comes in, eager as a new puppy, which, in SVU, is not a terribly good thing. And he’d gone through 3 other SVU’s at this point. Well, he had this mustache, well, really a pornstache.”

Alex, who was midway through a sip, choked. 

“You okay?”

“Yeah, just never expected you to say someone had a pornstache.”

“Well, he did. It just kinda clung to his face.” Olivia puts down her glass and brings a finger up to her face to demonstrate. Alex loses it again.

“Anyway, complete asshole with a pornstache, and one day he comes in clean shaven and totally different!”

“Really?”

“Yeah! I sometimes like to think that he just snorted in too hard one day and the mustache and assholeshness just came right off.”

Alex is dying at this point.

“So, he’s a nice guy then?” She asks when she can finally breathe again.

“Yeah, totally crushes on Barba though.”

“Any chance?”

“Maybe. Barba sees him as an annoying fly so…”

“It could go either way.” Alex agrees.

“How was Africa?”

“It was, it was an experience. The women there need so much help, but at some point, it becomes to much. SVU’s bad, but it’s so much worse these stories. So many of them gang raped and they get no justice.”

“Is that why you came back?”

“Yeah, that was one of the reasons. I mostly missed it here. It’s my home, no matter how long I’m gone.”

“Yeah.” Olivia agrees.

“Plus, the people are just too special.”


	5. The Good Old Days

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rated G

“So glad you could make it today.” Alex tells Olivia, moving aside to let the brunette into her apartment.

 

“Well, I’m just glad that I have something to do. My life’s gotten pathetically empty.”

 

“You’re acting commander of SVU and you have a kid, I wouldn’t call that pathetically empty.”

 

“I meant socially. The most I meet people for fun is when I take Noah for a playdate. I swear that kid’s got more of a social life than me.”

 

“More of a social life than mine. I basically have to rebuild my life now.”

 

“Yeah, speaking of which, have you heard from the DA’s office?”

 

“They want me for homicide.”

 

“Congrats!”

 

“I’ve done homicide before, this should be a nice break.”

 

“Only people who work in SVU would be so messed up to consider homicide to be a break.”

 

“You can say that again.”

 

“I’ve meet some of the people in homicide, they’re all pretty nice. You’ll probably make some friends if you don’t pull that ice queen attitude you pulled when you came to SVU.”

 

“Hey!”

 

“Sorry, Alex, but it took me half a year to get you to come out for a cup of coffee.”

 

“I guess.”

 

“Hell, it took me nearly a year to get you to go out with me.”

 

“So glad I said yes to that date.”

 

“Glad you did too.”

 

“Well, you want to do what we used to in the old days?”

 

“Oh god, don’t say old days, it makes me feel so  _ old _ .”

 

“When did you get self conscious about your age?”

 

“The exact minute I saw a wrinkle?” Alex laughs.

 

“Anyway, you want to do what we used to do?”

 

“Much better. And sure, I’ve been in the mood for dinner, movies, and chatting.”

 

“Is that good chinese place still in business?”

 

“Yeah, but it got really bad.” Olivia says, immediately knowing what place Alex had been talking about. She reaches her hand out for the phone. “Here, I’ll order if you want.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

“I’ll have to stock your phone with good food numbers, won’t I?”

 

“I don’t know. I actually started cooking when I moved to Africa.” Olivia fake dropped the phone and feigned surprise.

 

“Really, Alexandra Cabot using a pot?”

 

“Shut up! I was really good at, like all aspects of my life.”

 

“Except for modesty.”

 

“Did I forget, or did you get cheekier?”

 

“You forgot.”

 

“Anyway, next time you come over, I’ll cook.”

 

“That would be nice.”

 

Alex smiles, hopes rising. Olivia wanted to do this again. Olivia actually wanted to reconnect. 

  
They eat, watch bad movies, and talk, just like they did in the old(sorry, past) days.


	6. Doubt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rated G

Olivia picks up a bit of the food on her fork and lifts it too her eyes, staring at it intently, as if deciding whether it’s been poisoned or not.

 

“Olivia, I haven’t done anything to it, I promise.” Alex says, laughing at the brunette heavily inspecting the meal she had made.

 

“Then why don’t you prove it?”

 

“You’re such a child sometimes, you know that?” Alex sighs and takes a bite, then fake gags, “Oh god! That’s terrible!” She says, as if mocking the detective for even suggesting that her cooking would be bad. Olivia tentatively takes a bite, chewing for a minute, before humming her approval and digging into the meal. “See, did the world end?” Alex asks, watching the detective happily eating her food.

 

“It’s okay, I guess. I’ll survive.” Olivia says, then she smiles cheekily, and continues eating.

 

“You haven’t grown up at all.” 

 

“Oh, yes I have.”

 

“How?”

 

“I have a child and I’m running a branch of the NYPD, I think that can be considered as growing up.”

 

“Fine, you grew up responsibility wise, but not personality.”

 

“Hm. I like your new place.” Olivia says, looking around.

 

“Thanks, you want the tour?” 

 

“Sure, I’m pretty much finished eating this terrible food anyway.”

 

“If you’re going to do this every time, I won’t cook for you again.”

 

“Is that supposed to be a punishment?”

 

“I know you have no doubt in my abilities.” Olivia stops joking, and is serious for a moment.

  
“No doubt whatsoever.”


	7. Can I Trust You?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rated G

Alex and Olivia’s friendship fell into a neat pattern, meeting up for coffees, meeting up for dinner, just watching movies, they even went to the park together with Noah. Alex had never really liked children, but she immediately fell in love with the boy. 

 

“Can you believe I’ve been back for three months?” Alex asks as she pushes Noah on the swing.

 

“No. I still can’t believe you came back. I really never thought I’d see you again.”

 

“Well, here I am.” They stand in silence for a few moments, the only noise is the other kids playing and the cooing of Noah on the swing. “Olivia, are you still mad at me?”

 

“Not mad, no.”

 

“You think we could ever date again?” Olivia sighs, deeply, thinking.

 

“It’s hard, Alex. I always loved you and you know that, but you’ve left so many times with no notice that I’m scared. I’m scared that something good between us will happen and you’ll disappear again. And I’m not just thinking about me anymore, I have this one to worry about.” Olivia says, rubbing Noah’s head as he passes by. “I have to think what’s best for him too.”

 

“I know that I’ve hurt you, and I’m really sorry for that Olivia. It wasn’t right of me, but I’m not going anywhere. When I was in Africa, I realized I was missing a huge part of my life, and that was you. I don’t want to move around anymore.”

 

“I could do it, it’s just, we would have to do it slowly. Start dating like we’ve never dated before, gain my trust, not just jump to living together again.”

 

“Hm, I can do dates.”

 

“Can you now?”

 

“I happen to be exceptionally good at wooing people.” Olivia laughs at the blonde’s choice of words, “You want to go for dinner this Friday?”

 

“I would love that, Alex. Just remember that Noah’s part of this deal.”

 

“Of course I wouldn’t forget this guy.” Alex says. She picks Noah up off the swing and starts flying him around, gently of course, like he’s an airplane and he’s giggling and she’s giggling. He doesn’t talk much, and he’s shy of most people, but he took a quick likening to Alex.

 

Olivia smiled, watching Alex playing with her kid so easily.

  
Maybe she could trust her after all.


	8. Clothes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rated G

Olivia chewed on her lower lip, looking over the outfits she had chosen for tonight. She’d been looking forward to this all week, actually it was all she could think about, but now, she was nervous. She was a Lieutenant, dammit! Going on a date shouldn’t make her nervous. Yet, she felt the familiar swoop of butterflies in her stomach and remembered that this was Cabot after all. She smiles and picks up a long navy blue dress. She sighs, then picks up the phone, punching in Cabot’s new number. Olivia, admittedly, still remembers the blonde’s old ones. Yes, ones, all of the past ones since Olivia had meet her.

 

“Cabot.” Alex says crisply when picking up the phone, in true lawyer form.

 

“Benson.” She quips back.

 

“Liv…” Alex warns.

 

“At least tell me what I should wear!” Olivia demanded. The blonde had refused any hint as to where they were going tonight, just like on their first date years ago, but Olivia couldn’t figure out what to wear.

 

“Fancy. You still have that navy dress?” Alex asks. Olivia chuckles softly, looking at that exact dress in her hand.

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Good. Wear that. I’ll pick you up at 7:00 sharp, and if I’m late, I’ll take off the cabbie’s head.”

 

“I’m a police officer.” Olivia reminds her.

 

“Right, but you’d never tell on me.”

 

“Well…”

 

“You have no loyalty! Anyway, 7:00.”

 

“Looking forward to it.”

  
“Me too, Liv.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a note for anyone who saw the M rating and was looking for that, I'll be writing it in a few chapter, the plot needs to get there, but I have some great ideas, so you'll be rewarded for your patience!


	9. Surprises

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rated G

Liv looks at herself in the mirror, something she doesn’t do for a long time often, but today she finds herself staring. She’s wearing the dark blue dress, that in Alex’s opinion brings out her dark hair and eyes out perfectly, a pair of flats, and a light touch of make-up. Really just a touch, you’d have to know it’s there to see it. She hopes Alex likes it. It’s the same dress she wore the first time they went out together, the same style really, except she looks older, worn down, and she’s gotten softer through the years, the tough muscle she once possessed turning into soft curves. More feminine.

 

Olivia hears the buzz letting her know that Alex is outside, waiting to be let into the building. She quickly looks at the clock; 7:00, almost to the second. She pushes the button to let Alex into the locked building and paces, nervous. This is the most nervous she’s felt in years, and she’s dealt with hostage crises. She hears a knock on the door and she immediately opens the door and, well…

 

“Oh god, Alex. You look beautiful.” She look over the blonde. She’s also wearing the same dress she wore their first date. It’s red, hugs her curves perfectly, and backless. And it’s perfect. Her hair is put up into a loose bun with delicate, purposeful, loose curled strands highlighting the sides of her face. 

 

“Thanks. You do too.” She says, and she gives Olivia a blinding smile. “Now, put this one.” Alex handed over a piece of cloth.

 

“A blindfold?”

 

“Yup. Can’t have you knowing where we’re going.”

 

“Alex, I’m a police officer in the SVU division, I’m not getting into a cab blindfolded.” 

 

“Fine. Come with me then.” Alex says, and Olivia’s suspicious. She’d given up too easily. They walk outside, but Olivia see’s no cab. Alex, instead, walks up to a familiar black car and knocks on the window.

 

“Alex?”

 

“Hey, captain.” Amanda Rollins voice comes out of the car, totally surprising Olivia.

 

“Rollins…?” Olivia asks.

 

“I knew you’d put up a fight about the blindfold, so…” Alex says, smiling.

 

“Really, Alex? You got Rollins to chauffeur us around?”

 

“It’s not a problem!” Amanda pipes in. They both ignore her though.

 

“Yes I did.” Alex says, smugly.

 

“Fine then.” Olivia turns around. “I hate to do this, it degrades me a little, but, put it on.”

 

“There we go!” Alex says, happily, and she puts it on the brunette, afterwards carefully guiding her into the car and buckling her seatbelt.

 

“You know where to go.” Alex says, and Olivia assumes that is being said to Amanda. Olivia feels the car start and her hand shoots up to grab the handle.

 

“Don’t worry. You’re in good hands.” Rollins says at Olivia’s worry. She can feel Alex gently rubbing her shoulder, murmuring similar soothing words. It's not easy being in a car blindfolded, no idea where you're going.

 

Olivia relaxes a little, thanks to the women's kind words, and couldn’t believe that Alex was going through all of this to surprise her.


	10. Alex's Plan(Part 1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took me a while to post the new chapter. I've been busy and probably won't post another for a few days. My life's a bit hectic at the moment. 
> 
> Anyway, this chapter's done
> 
> Enjoy
> 
> Rated G

“Cabot?” Rollins asks when Alex walks into the room.

 

“Yeah.”

 

“I thought you… wait, where did you go?”

 

“Africa.”

 

“Oh, right! Helping women?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“How was that?” Amanda asks, indicating a chair for Alex to sit into, which she slowly sinks down into before answering.

 

“Amazing, thanks. Listen, I need your help.”

 

“Alex Cabot asking for help?”

 

“I get enough sass from Olivia.” Alex says, warningly.

 

“Olivia? Sass?”

 

“What, you haven’t seen her sassy?”

 

“Never. Well, once, but that’s it. Anyway, you need help?”

 

“With Olivia actually.”

 

“What do you need?”

 

“Did she ever tell you about me?”

 

“Honestly?” Alex nods, “Not really. Only when we were talking about lawyers. Why? Is there something I should know?”

 

“I need your help surprising Olivia.”

 

“Surprising her?”

 

“Yeah. Listen, I’m not surprised she never really talked about me. Back in the old days, oh, wow, that does make me feel old. Anyway, I met her at my first year here. It was only the 2nd year of this unit and she was on her second year of SVU.”

 

“Uh uh.”

 

“Anyway, I worked with them for about 3 years until,” Alex takes a shaky breath. It’s been over a decade, but the Valdez case still haunts her, “Until I was working a case and I got some threats.”

 

“What happened?”

 

“I got shot. Barely survived. Olivia actually thought I was dead for a week. Anyway, I had to go into Witsec. I lived as a woman named Emily for about 2 years before I returned to testify against him.”

 

“Did he get convicted?”

 

“Yeah, but he had men everywhere. It was a drug deal, and, well, it still wasn’t safe for me, so I entered the program for the second time.”

 

“And?”

 

“And I came back 4 years later, and started being their lawyer again, but only for about a year, until I went to the Congo to help women.”

 

“Wait… I didn’t meet you until Olivia’s 13th year.”

 

“Yeah, I came back again, and shared ADA with Novak, then went back to Africa.”

 

“Wow. So, you’ve really been everywhere, huh?”

 

“Sometimes I don’t even believe it.”

 

“What does this have to do with Olivia?”

 

“Well, we dated.”

 

“When?”

 

“Almost every time we were together except for the Valdez trial because I was only around for a week.”

 

“No offense, but, um, you’re a women.”

 

“I know. Very proud of it.” Alex says, smugly.

 

“No, I mean…”

 

“I know what you meant. Yes, Olivia’s bi.”

 

“I’m not sure she would like you telling me.”

 

“I’m not sure she’d like me telling you our history, but I need your help.”

 

“Yes, right, the help.”

 

“Well, I’m back for good, and I want her back, but she doesn’t trust me, understandably, but she’s giving me a chance.”

 

“A chance?”

 

“We’re going out tomorrow.”

 

“Well, good for her!”

 

“And, I need it to be really special. Think you could help me?”

 

“Anything to make Olivia happy.”

 

“Thank you, Amanda.”

 

Alex smiled. Part one of her plan was complete.


	11. The date (Alex's plan revealed)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long time between posting, my life's been a bit hectic recently, but I've already started writing the next chapter. I'll also admit that the ending is a bit rushed, but I had a lot of trouble writing it, so I just gave an overview. The next chapter is coming along nicely though. 
> 
> Sorry again for the delay and hope you enjoy this (G rated) chapter.

Olivia’s fingers nervously drummed on her leg. They’d been driving for a while and the stubborn blonde still gave her no hint as to where they were going.

“Hey, you okay?” Alex asks her, gently rubbing her arm.

“I’d be better if I knew where we were going.” Olivia says, causing Rollins to snort slightly. She tried to cover it up as a cough, but both of the women heard it for what it was.

“I’m not telling you. You’ll find out in a few minutes anyway.”

Olivia fake pouts(or best she can without the use of her puppy eyes) and Alex laughs.

“Really, it’s just a few more minutes, right Amanda?” Amanda hums her agreement.

They drive for three more minutes before they arrive.

“Okay, I’m going to help you out of the car, and then I’ll remove the blindfold. Does that sound good?”

“Just get me out of this thing.”

Alex, true to her word, helps Olivia out of the car and tells Rollins that she’ll call later for the ride.

“Next ride?”

“What, you think we were walking back?”

“No. Can you take this thing off?”

“Happy to.” She removes the piece of cloth and Liv gasps.

“Alex, how did you get reservations to this place? You need one months in advance!” Olivia looks at the restaurant they’re at. It’s the fanciest in New York(not just New York City, in New York) and she can’t even begin to attempt to pronounce the name of it.

“Maybe I made a reservation when I got back to New York, determent that by this time I’ll get you to go on a date with me.”

“Really?”

“No, but my sister owns it. She always makes sure there is one reservation open. You know for the mayor, president, or for when a family member needs to win back the most amazing girl.” Alex winks at Olivia and Olivia blushes. “She also keeps the best table open.” Alex says when a waiter leads them to a table on the deck overlooking the city.

“This is amazing Alex.”

“You haven’t even had any of the food yet.”

“It’s amazing already. Thank you so much Alex.”

“Well, don’t expect all dates to be like this missy.” Alex says, jokingly.

“Don’t expect me to ever take you someplace this fancy.” Olivia says in response. Alex laughs and assures Olivia that she doesn't expect that.

They have a lovely dinner(all the food is amazing), they go for a long walk afterwards, then call Rollins to drive them hope(thankfully not blindfolded this time). At the door, Olivia thanks Alex for the most amazing evening she’s ever had and kisses her goodnight, but not before making plans for a night in at her place on Sunday.

Alex and Olivia both can’t wait for Sunday to come.


	12. The promise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rated a G

Hey, come on in.” Olivia says, and she moves away from the door to let Alex in, Noah on her hip. “I couldn’t find a sitter for this guy, but it’s almost his bedtime anyway.”

“It’s not a problem, Liv.” Olivia smiles at the use of the nickname, “You guys are a package deal.” Alex takes Noah from Olivia slightly bouncing him. “How are you little man?” Noah giggles and coos in Alex’s arms. “Does he need a bath?”

“Yeah.”

“Then let's do it!” Alex says, and they make a beeline for the bathroom. She sniffs Noah's head and fakes a groan of disgust, “Whoo boy! You need one too.” Olivia laughs and starts the water, testing the temperature and making sure to add lots of bubbles and rubber duckies.

“I guess you’re wondering why I moved.” Olivia says after she’s put Noah in and is slowly washing his hair.

“I’ll confess I’m a little curious.”

“Well, are you sure? It’s a long story.”

“I should know, Olivia.”

“Okay, but, like I said, it’s long, so we should put him in bed first.”

“Well, that can’t be too hard. I have a law textbook in my purse and he can fall asleep to that.”

“Why, because it’s so boring?” Olivia asks. Alex sprays some water at her and Olivia laughs, spraying some back at her. Noah’s just looking up at the two of them with this look on his face like who are these immature idiots?

They eventually stop the water fight(which Alex was so winning) to put Noah to bed because he’s starting to drift off. After a short rendition of Goldilocks and the three bears, he’s asleep.

Olivia pours two glasses of wine, handing one to Alex and keeping one for herself.

“So, why’d you move, Olivia?” Alex asks.

“Short answer or long answer?”

“How about you tell me the short answer, so I know what I’m in for, then you can tell me to whole story.”

“Sounds good. Short answer was that I couldn’t stay there after I was kidnapped.”

“What?” Alex asks, startled.

“Long story might be necessary here.”

So Olivia told the whole story, starting at the very beginning with Lewis flashing the tourists, she told about Alice Parker, she told about coming home to a gun in her face. And after that she told about what she remembered about the kidnapping and she talked about him going to court, getting convicted for the first time. She told Alex about his escape and the game of Russian Rollete she was forced to play with him. Alex listened and held Olivia when she started to cry, soothing her.

“So, you understand why I couldn’t live there anymore.”

“I’m so sorry Olivia. I’m so sorry I wasn’t here to help you,”

“You’re here now.”

“And I’m not going to leave again.”

“Promise?” Olivia asks, hating how needy it comes out sounding, but she feels safe around Alex.

“I promise. I’m here for you and Noah and that’s not going to change.”


	13. Small Gestures

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> G rating

Olivia’s sitting at her desk looking over some paperwork when she hears a knock on the door. She looks up and slips off her glasses to see Amaro at the doorway, holding a bouquet of flowers.

“Nick?”

“A guy dropped these off for you.” Olivia has a quick flashback to Casey Novak in a hospital bed after being badly beaten up by a guy pretending to be a delivery guy with flowers.

“Are you sure he was a delivery guy?”

“Yeah. Why wouldn’t he be?”

“No reason. Thanks.” She says, standing up to except them. “You have any idea who they’re from?”

“No, but there’s a note attached to them. I figured it wasn’t my place to read it. You seeing someone, Captain?”

“Talk about that later.” She says and Nick gets the hint. “Did the DNA results come back?”

“No, but I already checked in with them and they said it would be done in an hour.”

“Thanks, Nick.” He nods and leaves her alone in her office with the flowers.

She puts the flowers in a vase she happens to have(when did she put a vase in her office?) and she looks at the note.

_Saw these at the flower store and thought of you. I know you like to pretend that you don’t like flowers, but I know your secret! Enjoy, and I’ll see you tonight._   
_-Alex_

Olivia smiles. She liked to pretend she didn’t like flowers but she did, especially delphiniums, which Alex had bought for her. She put the flowers in a vase and thought she should do something nice for Alex as well. Just like Alex knew Olivia’s secret, she knew what Alex really liked. She was a big fan of dark chocolate. Olivia looked at the clock. 11:30. She knew that Alex had lunch from 12:00 to 12:30, which gave her enough time to go out and buy some nice chocolate and get to office to put on her desk. They didn’t have a big case at the moment anyway, and her lunch started in ten minutes.

Olivia’s plan went off without a hitch and she left a very fancy box of chocolates on her desk, along with a note.

_I know your secret too! Thanks for the flowers, they’re gorgeous. Hope you enjoy these, and I’ll see you tonight._   
_-Liv_

When Olivia got back to the office, she, much to her confusion as to how it got there that quickly, found another note on her desk that said,

_I should never have told you my guilty pleasure! Thanks._   
_-Alex_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter or two, it'll be an M rating


	14. Olivia's Nosy Squad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> G rating

"Hey, Rollins, you know if Olivia’s seeing anybody?” Nick asks Rollins.

“How is that any of your business?”

“So she is seeing someone!”

“I didn’t say that.”

“Come on, Rollins, spill the beans!” Fin adds.

“If she wanted you to know if she was allegedly having a relationship, she would tell you.”

“She did get flowers the other day.” Amaro pipes in.

“And she’s been happier than usual.” Carisi adds in.

“What does being happy have to do with anything?” Fin asks.

“People are usually happier in relationships, especially new ones.”

“Guys! Stay out of her private life!” Rollins pipes in.

“Whose private life?” Olivia asks, exiting her office and walking into the conversation. Everyone falls silent and avoids her gaze. “Oh, my private life then.”

“Yeah.” Carisi says.

“Well, what do you want to know?”

“You’ve know me for 15 years, Liv. You can’t hide when you’re in a relationship from me.” Fin says.

“Ah. I knew you’d catch onto that eventually. Yes, I’m dating someone.”

“Captain, if you don’t mind me asking, with whom?” Carisi asks, nervously.

“Well, Carisi, you don’t know them but, I expect everyone else remembers Alex Cabot.”

“What?” Nick asks.

“Who?” Carisi asks at the same time.

“Again?” Is all Fin has to say, to which everyone asks, “Again?”

“Yes, Alex Cabot, Carisi, I have a photo, yes again, Fin.”

“Wow, I didn’t know she was back.”

“Came back about 4 months ago. She’s been working homicide.”

“I heard they won more cases recently!” Fin says.

“Anyway. Here, Carisi.” Olivia hands Carisi a recent photo of Alex and he whistles.

“Wow. I didn’t know you like women. Which, I’m totally okay with by the way.” Carisi says.

“Yeah, well. If you want my backstory with Cabot, ask Fin or Amanda. They know. Anyway, I have to go home and relieve Lucy.”

“Night captain.” The gang wishes her and they watch her exit.

“She’s really dating Cabot?” Nick asks.

“Yeah. I drove them to their first date and everything.” Amanda says.

“You said again.” Nick asks Fin.

“Well, if you want to know the whole story, buckle in. It’s a long one the two of them…”


	15. Law Textbooks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> T rating

Alex knocks on Olivia’s apartment door and is surprised when a young girl opens the door holding Noah.

“Hi, are you Alex?” She asks.

“Yeah.”

“I’m Lucy. I watch Noah during the day. Come in.” Noah starts fussing in Lucy’s arms, reaching out for Alex. “Well, that’s certainly a surprise. He’s usually very shy.”

“Not around me. How are you little man?” Alex asks, taking Noah out of Lucy’s arms and bouncing him around on her hip.

“Wow. Anyway, Olivia’s told me a lot about you, but she didn’t tell me you were a women.”

“Yeah, she tends to leave that detail out.”

“Olivia called and said she’s stuck in traffic, but she’ll be here in a few minutes.”

“Thanks. It’s almost his bedtime. Do you mind if I put him to bed?”

“No, of course not.”

Alex smiles and takes Noah into his room, putting him into his crib. She gently strokes his hair to calm him.

“You know, you’re getting pretty big. We’ll have to get you a big boy bed soon. How does that sound?” She asks softly and he smiles. “I hope you want a good story because I brought you a great one.”

Alex pulls out a book and starts reading and keeps reading, even after Noah falls asleep.

~~~~~~~~

“Hey Lucy. Everything went okay today?” Olivia asks as she enters her apartment.

“Yup. After daycare I took him to the park and then we played at home and he ate all of his vegetables tonight.”

“That’s great. Is he asleep?”

“I guess so. Alex put him to bed.”

“Well, thank you so much Lucy. Unless I get called in, you’re off tomorrow.”

“Thanks.” Lucy leaves the apartment, tired after the day, and Olivia makes a beeline for Noah’s bedroom.

“Dred Scott v. Sandford, 1857, 7-2 decision; denied citizenship to African American slaves.” Olivia can hear Alex say quietly. She pushes the door open to find Alex reading from a giant textbook.

“Are you really reading him a law textbook?”

“Of course. I told you I carry one in my purse.”

“How is he?” Olivia asks, going up to the crib, gently stroking the sleeping boy’s hair. Noah stirs slightly and smiles.

“He’s great. I think he needs a real bed though.”

“You think?”

“In a month or two, he’ll be climbing out of this crib or breaking the bars.”

“It’s wood.”

“Mine was wood, but I still broke it.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, you think I was going to stay in a cage?” Olivia chuckles slightly and leans over the bars, kissing Noah goodnight.

“We’ll go to the park tomorrow, ‘k love?” Noah just sleeps on. “Come on, we should probably get out of here.”

Alex nods and let's Olivia take the lead.

~~~~~~~~

“So, I didn’t think traffic was that bad.”

“No, I got held up by the squad. They wanted to know if I was dating someone.”

“And, did you tell them?”

“Well, let's just say Fin’s surprised. He didn’t know you were back.”

“Yeah, well. I should catch up with him.”

“These past few weeks especially have been very nice.”

“Oh? What made them so great?” Alex asks, in mock confusion.

“I don’t know. It definitely doesn’t have anything to do with any blonde ADA’s.” Olivia smiles, before leaning in and kissing Alex. They kiss for a few minutes before they pull apart for air.

“I didn’t get to say a proper hello yet.” Olivia says, suggestively.

“Well then, hello.” Alex says, laughing lightly, before pulling Olivia into another kiss. Alex’s been true to her word and has kept things slow, letting Olivia take the lead into new things. They’d only been dating two weeks, but with their history, it felt like longer and the more time Olivia spent with Alex, more old feeling reappeared, and tonight, Olivia wanted to go farther.

Olivia’s tongue gently ran across Alex’s lips and Alex’s opened her mouth to her, groaning as she felt Olivia’s tongue ran over hers. Olivia gently pushed Alex backwards until she was lying down on the couch with Olivia on top of her, her legs in between Alex’s and a hand on either side of her face.

“Is this okay?” Olivia whispered.

“Just perfect.” Their mouths reconnected and Alex’s hands, which had been in Olivia’s hair, slide down to gently, hesitantly, toy with a sensitive part at the back of Olivia’s neck. When she heard Olivia suck in a breath, she kissed her way down Olivia’s jaw and started gently licking and kissing the area where the shoulder connects to the collarbone.

“Shit, Alex.” Olivia says, a little breathlessly, and she gently presses her legs together as Alex’s hands slide down over her torso and across her abdomen.

“Just as sensitive there as I remembered. Is this okay?”

“Better than okay. You want to go to my room? It’s a little comfier.”

“Does that mean I have to stop what I’m doing?”

“Just for a minute, but we can have more fun in there.” Alex mock pouts and Olivia laughs.

“Well, if you promise…”

“I do.” Olivia cuts in.

“Then, I guess I can live with it.” Alex says glumly, before they jump up and race to Olivia’s bedroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise, all the smut is going to be in the next chapter(I'm not skipping it), I just felt it better to split this chapter into two. It'll be posted soon.


	16. Bedroom Fun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Definitely an M and admittedly just smut. Hope you enjoy!

Alex’s pushed up against the closed bedroom door, but Olivia forces her to step away a bit to remove her sweater, giving her more access to a large range of skin to explore.

“Liv, is it going to be okay with Noah in the apartment?” Alex asks, breathlessly. Olivia looks up from what's she’s doing.

“I stopped using a baby monitor and he’s a sound sleeper. It should be fine, unless you’re as loud as you used to be.” Olivia grins devilishly as she cups Alex’s breasts through her bra, before slipping her hand inside and rolling a nipple between her fingers, causing Alex to gasp and her head falls against the door.

“Damn you.”

“Really, it’ll be fine. Be as noisy as you want to.” Olivia whispers, then lays a open mouthed kiss to Alex’s sternum and Alex moans. Alex starts unbuttoning Olivia’s shirt and after the article of clothing has been discarded, Olivia kisses Alex again, gently, showing her desire but her patience as well, and starts shuffling them to the bed. Olivia lays Alex down and moves to sit on Alex’s waist, but Alex stops her.

“You think I’m letting you take over that easily?” She rolls them so that she is on top, and, much to her pleasure, she realizes that Olivia’s bra hooks in the front. She unhooks it and throws it over her shoulder before gently cupping Olivia, her thumbs brushing over Olivia’s hardened nipples.

“You’re still beautiful.”

“You too.”

They were both enjoying themselves. They’d done this before, but somehow, everything they did was like a new discovery. Like learning something that time had caused them to forget.

Alex leans over and takes one of the pebbly nipples into her mouth, sucking and circling it with her tongue. Olivia had always been the quiet one in bed, so Alex gently bites down until she can get Olivia to make a noise. Alex then moves to remove Olivia’s pants, leaving Olivia in nothing but her boy shorts.

“You still wear boy shorts!” Alex said, happily.

“I’m still a police officer! I have to run around, which isn’t ideal with anything fancy.”

“It wasn’t a complaint.”

“I have a complaint.”

“What?”

“You’re wearing way too much clothing for my liking.” Alex looks at herself. She’s still wearing her skirt and bra. She removes both, leaving her in her underwear as well. She reaches up to remove her glasses, but Olivia catches her arm.

“Is it okay if those stay on?”

“If you want.” Alex runs her fingers along Olivia’s underwear, running her finger along the band, before removing them. Olivia’s kept her legs squeezed together, to help fight her rising arousal, but Alex gently pries them open. She kiss Olivia again, her tongue running over Olivia’s, before gently running a finger along Olivia. She pulls away, gasping.

“You’re so wet!”

“Your fault.”

Alex decides to change course and she removes her finger, then pops it into her mouth, humming her approval. Olivia tasted exactly how she remember, all salty and sweet and perfect. She then eases herself between Olivia’s legs. Olivia looks at her in confusion, but the look of confusion turns into anticipation as she realizes what Alex’s going to do. Alex doesn’t break eye contact, even as she leans forward and places a broad, long lick through Olivia’s sex and she’s rewarded with a gasp.

Olivia continues to give small moans and gasps as Alex’s velvety tongue gently explores her labia. Alex probes around her entrance for a bit before engaging in several shallow penetrations, which leaves Olivia gasping, but it’s not what Olivia really wants, and Alex knows that, so Alex drags her tongue up to Olivia clit and Olivia’s hips buck when she first makes contact. She circles the bud a few times before making a solid seal with her lips and sucking vigorously.

After a few minutes, Alex can tell Olivia’s getting close, so she raise a hand beneath her chin and gently enters a finger, and when she receives a moans, she enters another, slowly working them in and out before curling them.

“Shit, Alex.” It’s the first thing Olivia’s said, so she gently adds a third and curls them all against that spongy part inside of her and that's it. Olivia goes tense for a second, before shaking, but Alex keeps moving through Olivia’s organism and doubling her efforts and can actually feel Olivia building up again, before Olivia’s even finished.

“Alex, you if don’t…” There’s a pause and Olivia comes crashing down again, “Alex!” This time Alex doesn't slow the movement of her fingers and tongue, gently bringing her down and cleaning her up afterwards.

“Well, that was great.” Olivia says, smiling contently.

“Glad I could please you.” Alex says. She’s throbbing, but she doesn’t want to push Olivia. If this is all she wanted to do tonight, that was okay with her, but Olivia had other plans. She flipped the blonde over, causing Alex to squeal in surprise.

“Let me repay the favor.”


	17. Next morning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ratings gone done to a T

Olivia wakes up and looks at the clock. 5:55. She’s been waking up at the time like clockwork for the past year. She shifts slightly, forgetting Alex was there until she hears Alex mumble unhappily and grip Olivia closer.

“Sorry sweetheart.”

“Olivia?” Alex murmurs, lifting her head.

“Hm.”

“What time is it?”

“Almost 6.”

“Hm. Last night was fun.” She kisses Olivia morning, despite what she’s assuming is her awful morning breath.

“Yeah. I’d offer some after morning-sex, but Noah always wakes up at 6, so I’d better get out of bed and put a robe on.”

“You and your stupid kid.” Alex says, teasingly, and she steals another kiss.

“I happen to know that you like that stupid kid.” Olivia says, then rolls them so that she’s on top and kisses Alex again. Just as Alex’s hands start to roam, they hear a cry.

“Damn that stupid kid.” Olivia says, jokingly, and gets up out of bed with over exaggerated sighs, causing Alex to giggle, before Alex gets up and follows her.

“I’m gonna take him to the park today, you wanna come?”

“Sure, sounds like fun.”


	18. I'm ready

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, it's jumped from the relationship being 3 weeks to 3 months. 
> 
> Rated G

"Okay, I think it’s in.” Olivia says, wiping some sweat off of her brow. It’s a twin sized bed and they got the most childish sheets they could find; a Star Wars set with a blue comforter.

“It looks great.”

“Well, you were right, as usual. He needed it.”

“Yeah, about a week ago before he climbed out of it.” Alex points out. Noah had climbed out three days ago and they’d put him back in, but he kept escaping, and Olivia was worried he was going to hurt himself.

“You mentioned. Let’s see how he likes it.” Olivia goes and finds Noah in the living room, playing with some trucks.

“You ready for bed, kiddo?” Noah pouts and fusses, obviously he’s not done playing with his trucks, but it’s already half an hour past his usual bedtime, so Olivia doesn’t give in.

“It’s a normal sized bed, but he’s so small in it, it looks huge!” Olivia says, after she’s put him in. He looks all snuggled and she finds his teddy bear for him.

“You want me to read him a story?”

“You’re not going to pull out your law textbook again, are you?”

“Maybe…” Olivia glares at her and she goes to Noah's bookshelf, pulling out a fairy tale instead. “Nothing fancy tonight, I promise.”

They read him the book, taking on different characters with different voices to make him giggle, until he’s asleep.

“The End…” Olivia says, closing the book. She leans forward and gentle rubs Noah’s hair and gives him a kiss, “I love you.”

And much to Olivia’s surprise, Alex does the same, kissing Noah and whispering ‘I love you’ to him. They quietly exit the room, careful not to wake Noah.

“So…” Olivia starts once they’re on the couch.

“I’ve known him for 6 months Olivia, yes, I’ve definitely fallen in love with that boy.”

“Glad to hear that, because we’re a package deal, and I love you.” It’d taken 3 months into their relationship, but Olivia was finally ready to say it again.

“I love you too.” Alex says, immediately.

“I never stopped. I may have been mad at you for a long time, but I still loved you. I always will.” Olivia says, quietly, before she pulled Alex in for a gentle kiss, one of reassurance.

“I still promise I won’t leave. I’ll never hurt you again.” Alex whispers when they pull away. 


	19. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to all who followed along and I've hoped you enjoyed it!
> 
> This last chapter's rated a T.

Ma’am, you’re going to have to leave the room.” The nurse informs Olivia

“Why, what’s going wrong?”

“We need you to leave the room. A doctor will keep you up to date!” Olivia nods and squeezes Alex’s hand one more time before leaving and watching through the window, feeling sick to her stomach.

Olivia knew this was a risk, she had been scared for Alex’s health thought the whole pregnancy, in fact, at Alex’s age, she didn’t even want Alex to get pregnant. There was too many risks, but Alex had done it anyway. Stubborn she always was. And here she was, all she could do was wait.

~~~~~~~~

“Mrs. Benson-Cabot?” A doctor asks, approaching her. Olivia looks up and her heart sinks at the expression on the doctor’s face.

“Yes.”

“I’m very sorry. We tried as hard as we could, but there was just too many complications. We were able to save the baby and she’s healthy.”

“Thank you, Doctor. Can you give me a minute?” He nods and slips away. Olivia sits there, stunned. She knows she should cry or something, but she just can’t.

~~~~~~~~

Olivia holds her second child. Jessica Alex Benson-Cabot. She’s beautiful and looks just like Alex. Olivia never really liked the name Jessica, but Alex had always wanted it. And the middle name…

Her squad is there, Fin, Carisi, Rollins, Barba, the new guy, and even Munch and Cragen are here to visit the baby and to say they’re sorry.

A nurse comes to take Jessica away, a few tests and vaccines, and Noah, now about 5, pulls on her pant leg.

“Mommy, where’s mom?” Olivia doesn’t answer. “Where’s Alex?” Olivia still doesn’t doesn’t answer.

“Hey, how about we go get some ice cream?” Fin asks Noah and Noah happily agrees.

The room’s quiet and something finally snaps inside Olivia. She hasn’t been able to cry in the past two days since she got the news. She hasn’t been able to eat or sleep either, but today something just snaps.

“You promised! You promised you’d never leave! That’d you never hurt me again! You promised, you promised…” She keeps shouting, slamming her hands against the wall until they sting.

And she finally starts crying.


End file.
